Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Crazy Musings

I know that everyone has little things that amuse them (and possibly only them), myself included. I'm not talking about hobbies, I'm talking about other random things. Sometimes I think I must be nuts for some of the stuff that I find funny. 

For example, TV shows. Friends and How I Met Your Mother are my favorite shows that many people like. They wouldn't be so popular if not, right? Here's what's different about me: I can watch them over and over and over and over again. And still laugh like they're new ever time. It drives Hubs crazy. Will and Grace and Frasier have the same effect on me. Now I'll take it one step cheesier: I love, love, love Full House. Yes, Bob Saget, Dave Coulier, John Stamos (ooh la la!), MK & Ashley Olsen...that Full House. I watch it nearly every day and dream of owning the big Tanner house-shaped boxed DVD set.

Yeah, I love it that much. (If you wanna buy it for me, I'll love you forever!I'll dedicate a whole post to how awesome you are. Anyone?) I also really like Cheers, but no where near as much as Full House.

Another thing that amuses me is giving non-verbal living things around me voices, such as animals and babies. For instance, Little Miss, in my head, has an English accent. This is particularly true when she's crying. She screams things at me like (get your British accents ready folks), "Change my nappie and knickers Auntie J! I made a stinky poo!" or, "You aren't my Mum, you bloody imposture!" or, "My dummy fell out you ninny!" (dummy = pacifier) or, "Isn't it tea time yet? I'm bloody starving!" You get the picture. It makes her crying seem must less stressing, and much more hilarious, when it's got a British accent behind it. I do this with my dogs too. Hungry Dog sounds like Eeyore, "Oh, why bother. I'll just have to get up and move again anyway." Footlong Dog sounds like Jennifer Tilly, kind of dumb yet sweet. And Rat Dog sounds like...well, you know the Doberman on Up when his collar is all messed up? Yeah, that. I haven't decided on voices for my cats. I know, for shame!

I'm coming out a little crazy, aren't I? Oh well.

Since I'm all in, here's my craziest little musing: I have created an alter-ego of myself. She's married to a wonderful man who almost never messes up. She has four perfect and healthy children whom she never gets terribly annoyed at and/or yells at. (What?! I never do that either.) She buys only natural/organic foods and never eats fast food. She has a wonderful extended family that supports all her choices. She is smart, beautiful, thin, confident, and secure. She has a beautiful clean house, happy marriage and children, and is in love with every aspect of her life. Sure, she's had strife, but she's made it through with dignity and class. She's perfect. I kind of hate her.  And envy her. Even her stupid name is perfect: Charlotte. Beautiful, feminine, chic...just like her. Sometimes when I'm feeling low, I imagine what she'd be doing with her imaginary family and it entertains me. I even write blog posts in my head that show how perfect she is. And how she's got everything figured out. Stupid Charlotte. And yet, I continue imagining her. What does that say about me?

Now that I've thoroughly proven what an idiot I am, how about you? What silly things do you like/think about/do that amuse you? I know I'm not the only, so fess up people!

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Week in Review: February 20-26

We took a much more eclectic and "unschooling" approach to our week. I'm not really going to categorize what we did this week, but instead just give the rundown. We had many trips this week, and those made up most of our schooling. I'm getting really good at making every place a chance to learn, so even a trip to the grocery store can be a lesson (can we say math?)! We did do our Bible Study, Sign Language practice, and Hooked On Phonics (he learned -id and -ig sounds this week and added sight words she, this, & what). We also did our social lessons and the pragmatics stuff. That was really all the "formal" stuff we did. We continued our reading of Beverly Cleary books by reading all of Ribsy and then starting the Ramona Quimby books. We absolutely loved reading Ribsy! It was our favorite of them all. Even Hubs was interested in Ribsy's journey.

Wednesday, we went to the library for storytime and learned about tigers. Bub had a blast pretending with the other kids and learned a lot about how tigers stay healthy and grow to be so big. He also learned some silly nonsense about tigers sleeping, but he understood that was all in fun.During OT they focused on building arm strength and she helped me reinforce learning to write his numbers (he's really struggling with "2"). He got to ride around on a wheelie board and pull himself with his arms and pick up tiny toys around the room. He loved it, but it was quite a workout! We also had some errands to run in between bigger trips that day, so it was an opportunity for social interaction and helping him learn to deal with money.

Thursday we had our second edition of Mad Science at a local pizza/game place. This Mad Science was titled "Detective Science" and showed the kids how using their 5 senses can help them solve a mystery. While Bub did enjoy it, it wasn't the most age appropriate one for him. He did enjoy the fingerprinting though. Before the science presentation started, the teacher had asked Bub to put away his "toys" (a Tangle and Silly Putty) so he could concentrate and not be distracted. Because he has Asperger's, those things help keep him from being distracted, and I nicely told him that. He kind of tried to refute me, but quickly gave up when he realized that I wasn't going to back down and the other moms in the room totally had my back. I loved it that all the moms in the room immediately stood up for him and me and made sure he understood that all kids learn differently and he shouldn't be asked to put away his toys. It made me happy that they understood it without me having to defend our reasons. Photobucket I love homeschooling! That trip was made especially good by that and just being able to talk to other homeschooling moms who understand why we homeschool. One even had a kid on the spectrum, so she completely understand how this has been so good for him. We actually ended up spending 4 hours at the place eating, chatting, playing games, and doing the science class. It was super fun for us both and Little Miss was a complete angel the whole time. I love having her around. Photobucket

Friday evening was the trip we've been looking forward to since seeing Annie!; James and the Giant Peach. A local kids theater group put this one on and the whole family got to go this time. It wasn't the most fancy play ever, but the kids totally loved it and both want me to look into theater classes for them. I think Goober would be great at acting, his personality is so big and charismatic, and it would be a great lesson in interaction and overcoming anxiety (if he could) for Bub. I will be researching that option on Monday for them both. The next play is Charlotte's Web and I'd love to see them in it.

Our biggest (and best) field trip for the week was to our local kid-focused museum for Dr. Seuss day. It was a day of fun, learning-based activities, freebies in honor of Seuss, and tons of exercise! We even got to meet the Cat in the Hat, which Bub loved. Goob was way to old for that. LOL Hubs loved the momentum exhibit where he and Goober went spinning very quickly in circles. They almost vomited. I really loved all the Dr. Seuss themed events and that they kept engaging the children the whole 2.5 hours we were there. Goober's favorite part was running in the hamster wheel-type exhibit and Bub's was the same spinning thing that Hubs liked. He also liked making "Oobleck", aka slime.

Of course, we went to church today (and will go to the night service) and it was family Sunday so the kids stayed with us. It was Baptism day and 16 kids were baptized in water, which was awesome. It was the first time Bub remembers having seen baptisms and he was very interested. After church, Hubs took Bub (Goober was with his dad for the afternoon) on a walk and to a fishing expo at a sporting goods store and later to the park. Later Bub and I worked on parts of a sentences and did some math-based sorting activities. He spent the rest of the day learning about fishing and going over fishing stuff with his Daddy. I've been completely lazy and blogging, catching up on emails, Facebooking, and just general laziness. I've had a very busy week and my chronic pain has caught up to me. I'm just trying to relax it away. I did get a really fantastic email about a series of classes, geared for kids 7 and up. I had emailed about Bub saying that he is very smart and mature for his age (both true) and that I think he'd do well. He will have shortcoming with motor issues and the fact that he can't read, but I'll plan on staying with him to make up for those. I also assured her if it wasn't working out for any reason, we would withdraw without asking for refund so there would be no worries about him disrupting the class. I figured it was a long shot and probably wouldn't happen, but I'd never know unless I asked. I'ts a Lego-animation workshop and he would absolutely love to be involved and I would love to give him the chance. I was extremely thrilled when the person heading the class replied that she is a homeschooling mom of a special needs child, so she completely understands that things aren't always black and white with special needs kids. She said she would love to give him the chance, and let me sign both he and Goober up. They are both so excited about this workshop and I think they'll love it. I love it that the homeschooling community is so accepting and understanding about children and how much they know and how they learn. It warms my heart to know a group of people so willing to accept my quirky kiddo. Photobucket

Tomorrow starts a whole week of Seuss. Yay for Dr. Seuss week! We'll also be seeing a Veggie Tales movie premier possibly doing Sensory Night at a bounce house place.

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Why So Hateful?

This is something that has bothered me for years, so I'm dedicating a blog post (or two) to the subject. I will preface by saying that I have no interest for any hateful, demeaning, or rude comments on this post. I am open to questions, in fact I welcome them, but have no intention of leaving anything hateful up to be read by anyone. Please do your best to be respectful when replying to this. Don't waste your time or mine with your hostility. 

Why are human beings so hard on one another? This is especially true about mothers. I've seen it time and time again, especially on the Internet, that moms find pleasure (or something, there's got to be a reason) in tearing each other apart. Be it the breast/bottle feeding debate or any other, moms can be really rude and disrespectful of one another's parenting choices. Since we are all of one sisterhood, why aren't we more compassionate? Aren't we all trying our hardest at making the best decisions for our family?

As a side note, of course I am talking about parents who truly are doing their best. This category does not include the abusive and neglectful parents of the world, who are not giving their child the best and what they deserve. Make no mistake about who I am speaking of.

I am one of "those women" who have made parenting and lifestyle decisions that haven't fit society's view of "normal". I have come to these conclusions and made my choices based on research from reliable sources, prayer, discussions, asking questions, getting input from my husband, and good old-fashioned instincts. Every serious decision has been made painstakingly with many, many hours devoted and sometimes with many tears and sleepless nights as well. Make no mistake, I have not taken these lightly. I have had terrible, unspeakable things said to me both in real life and online for these choices. From extended breastfeeding to co-sleeping to homeschooling and many things in between, everyone has an opinion and they have no problem telling me theirs; sometimes in the most arrogant, judgmental, and contemptuous way they can. Why so much hatred? Just because my research led me to a different decision than you, why does that make me wrong? I don't think it makes you wrong that you're doing what you think is right, so why am I not afforded the same courtesy?

I pride myself on being informed and not being ignorant to anything that matters to me. It's one of my best qualities and part of what makes me, me. I stand by my decisions. I always say to make a choice and own it, and that I do. I am confident in the choices I've made and know, beyond a shadow of doubt, that they were what's best for my family. This is all I want for others. If you have made educated and informed decisions for your family, and your conclusions were not the same as mine, then good for you. Being informed is always right. Being secure in what you know and in your life and your family is essential to being happy, and if you are secure and confident in what you've chosen, then why the need to tear others down?

Now, I always welcome respectful opposition. In my opinion, opposition threatens ignorance. If I've made a decision and someone brings up a point I hadn't thought of or never came across, it's always good to re-evaluate with new evidence or opinions. Ignorance isn't, actually, bliss and adversity helps teach me and helps me evolve. I know that most people in the world, heck most people I know, don't agree with me and I welcome respectful discussions. I always enjoy a spirited, courteous debate.

This standpoint rolls over into my views about Christianity. I'm not a religion-pusher so I'm not going into that here, but if you're interested, you can see that post here.

No two people are the same, and that's the beauty of life. If we were all walking around looking, acting, feeling and believing the same things, the world would be so boring. This is what's brilliant about humanity and society, we are constantly growing and changing. I doubt anyone is the same now as they were 10 years ago, unless you are just not trying or don't care. Or, I suppose, you could already know everything, and then kudos to you (note the sarcasm). I welcome change and am constantly working to improve myself and I appreciate others who are doing the same. 

In closing, I just truly wish that others would use their resources, talents, and voice to do something worthwhile with their lives. Instead of pushing your beliefs on someone who disagrees, why don't you help by respectfully sharing information with someone who is struggling? Instead of advocating so hard against a person or group of people, why not advocate for someone or a group of people who need it? Wouldn't it make people happier to not spread such hate? Maybe then the world would be a better place.

Basically, what it all boils down to is...

True Christianity

Small note from me to preface...
This will be a two-part post. They were originally going to be one, but because I have no intention of shoving my religion down anyone's throat, I decided on two. I do not want to be another Christian who has offended someone in the name of God, so this gets a separate post so no one has to read it that doesn't want to.

My post that will follow is about hatred and this goes along with that. So many "Christians" spew hatred in the name of the Lord, and it's not right. To everyone who has been hurt by "Christians" and The Church, I am truly sorry. Even if you read nothing else I say, I want to say that Jesus was never that way and I'm deeply sorry that you were hurt and judged by someone who had no right to do so you. It's about time the real Christians start fixing what's been broken by hypocrites, so I apologize sincerely from the bottom of my heart.

I am a Christian, a follower of Christ. Not a hate-mongering, Bible thumping, sign holding, anti-rights, hater of sinners. I believe in the Bible and what it teaches: Love. Jesus hung out with thieves and prostitutes, not the wealthy and influential. God teaches us through His Son and His Word to love our neighbor and show the world the peace of the gospel. So why do so many so-called Christians feel the need to spew hatred? Why is it that they use God's (in my opinion) perfect Word to validate their viewpoint when the Bible preaches exactly the opposite of what they are speaking? Christ would be ashamed of them. Actually, I think He is completely disappointed by them. The fact that my beliefs that I hold so dear are used as a tool to hurt so many is abhorrent and unbelievably sad to me. Why must "Christians" judge others? Where in the Bible does it say that we are to be the judge of others? It doesn't.

"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." Matthew 7:1-2 (NIV)

Christians need to be secure in themselves and their God and not feel the need to constantly "convert" others with their words. Be a Christian and show people what true Christianity, not hypocrisy, is all about with your actions, not your words. Use your resources to do good instead of to spew hate. Show love by advocating for someone, instead of against. Give compassion, understanding, peacefulness, kindness, unselfishness, and love a try. Understand that not everyone believes the same as you, nor do they have to, and it's not your right to prove to them that they're wrong. Everyone is allowed to believe what they feel is right and true, and it's no one's job to change their minds. You certainly won't do it with hypocrisy. Stop letting everyone else change your walk with God, have a relationship with Him that's not defined by anyone else. Stop judging and worry about your own sins and shortcomings. Better yourself.

(Remove the Jesus stuff and that's good advice for everyone.)

This quote from John Cusack sums it up nicely.

I completely agree.

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Week in Review: February 13-19

Language Arts: For this week, we did our previously planned unit on snow and winter. Our FIAR book was Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost. We read several other winter/snow themed books, Bub's favorite being Red Sled by Lita Judge. We did a whole day dedicated to winter sports and Bub really loved learning about snowboarding and skiing. We also focused a lot on poetry, and read several children's poetry books, including ones by A.A. Milne. We are coming right along with reading our Beverly Cleary books, and we finished Henry and the Paper Route at the end of the week.

Math/Science: We started math out of our new Everyday Math book, the kindergarten edition, and did a lot with our balance scale and sorting stuff. We also have a subscription to IXL.com now, which has been a fun way for him to learn math. We're just working now on writing numbers, recognize place values, and skip counting. Pretty simple and basic, but that's really all kindergarten math is. For science, we're mostly just looking up stuff on the internet and watching documentaries. Whatever he's interested in or our theme. This week, it was a lot about weather.

Social Studies/Life Skills: Last weekend I found two really great books for our "social" lessons at a used book store. One is Visual Perceptual Skill Building, which focuses on paying attention to complete tasks. The other was Tuned In to Learning: Social Skills & Pragmatics for Autism and Related Needs (vol. 1) which focuses on building social skills. This books is amazing! It puts social situations into cute, easy songs that Bub can learn and will help him in real life situations. He responds so well to music, so this is perfect for him. I cannot tell you how valuable these will be!

Bible Study: We have a kid's devotional Bible we're reading out of now. We read the simplified Bible story, then the "real life" application and discuss it. Usually we have time for two in one period. I'm open to suggestions on any good, kid-friendly Bible studies, if anyone has any.

Foreign Language: We have officially started our Sign Language lessons with some basic words and the alphabet, which will take a while to master. We'll stay on alphabet and then learn numbers before moving on to any more comprehensive lessons.

We had a great week learning about snow. To add to our delight, it snowed several inches on Monday, so the timing was perfect. We got to play with real snow, instead of the tube stuff, and have many sensory experiences with it. Hands down, the highlight of our week was seeing the musical, Annie!, together on Friday evening. Seeing that he's only five years old, I wasn't sure how Bub would handle a musical for the first time. We brought along his "busy hands bag" so he would have more success at paying attention and also brought his weighted compression vest, to help keep him calm. Turns out, neither of these were needed. As soon as "A Hard Knock Life" started, he was engaged. He sat, open-mouthed, the whole time taking it all in. It was such a good learning experience and he completely loved it! I think he has developed a love of theater now, which makes me smile.

We had a great week! Next week we have several field trips, so we're going to do a kind of unschooling week. We'll still do some of our lessons, but probably not a FIAR book.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Failure IS an Option

Tonight we had an in-home training with a local autism advocate. These training sessions are just in general and help educate parents with children on the spectrum. They are required to receive the therapeutic services we do from this group. Anywho, tonight's training was about Thinking Sets and helping change the way people view disabilities. I pride myself in being educated about things that are important, and my children top that list. Plus, I've worked with children for many years, including children on the autism spectrum and children with other various disabilities, so most of these training topics were not new to me. So, here I am bopping along bragging about our reward system which gives them rewards for completing their chores instead of punishments for not completing them. And the freedom I give to my children by letting them have many choices in their day, such as choosing their clothes. And how I use "people first language" (i.e. a person with autism, not an autistic person) when I speak about people. And a whole bunch of other things that only Mother of the Year can do (*this is an unofficial title, I haven't actually won any awards*). Here I am, thinking I'm all high and mighty when she said something that shattered my world: Let them fail.

What? Failure?! Why would I let them fail when I could just help them succeed? What could possibly be learned from failure. Nothing! Nothing I tell you. Failure has never helped anyone and I'm doing a huge service by keeping them from experiencing it.

Except, I'm not.

I honestly hadn't put too much thought into it, or I would have been working on it before. I pride myself on being self-aware, which was why this revelation shattered my world. Here I am, going along with life thinking I know myself and then I learn this. This was truly an epiphany to me and caused me to take a good, hard look at the issues and annoyances we (I)  face.

Everyone leans on me for everything. Not sure where a dish goes? Ask mom. Don't know if these clothes match? Ask mom. Need to know what to cook for supper? Ask mom. The list goes on and on. These people (and I'm adding my hubs into this category as well) can't accomplish anything or make any decisions without my approval. And. it. drives. me. crazy. So now I'm forced to re-examine it and realize that maybe, just maybe...

I caused this?!?  (<--both of those are me beating up myself)

Really? In subconsciously trying to keep them from experiencing failure, I have created a whole household of human beings that are dependent on me for everything. And it's irritating. Oh so irritating. And what's more irritating is that I caused it. There's nothing like being irritated by something that you caused. It's being irritated by yourself. That's a whole new level of irritation, I tell you.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm happy to know because now I can fix it (ignorance ain't bliss, ya'll) and teach my family to be self-sufficient and learn from their mistakes. I can stop Hubs from feeling like he needs to check in with me on every. single. thing. I can teach Goober and Bub to pay attention to their surroundings and learn from their mistakes the only way they can: by making them. There is much to be gained from this earth-shattering revelation, and I plan on fixing it.

Wish them luck. There will be many failures in the near future.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Week in Review: February 6-12

There is really nothing to review for this week. Our intention was to read a book of poetry and talk about winter activities and weather. Sadly, Bub was feeling pretty crummy post surgery, so we didn't accomplish a lot at all. Plus, I am now babysitting my niece, Little Miss (8 weeks old ), and she was having a hard time adjusting to being away from her mama. It was good to have an adjustment week to get on a schedule with the baby one around, so we took advantage. We did a lot of reading (Beverly Cleary books, mostly) and finally made a trip to the library Saturday because Bub was finally feeling somewhat better that day and wanted to get out. Our trip the library was fun; he picked out five comic books and played a round of checkers (with my help) with Goober. We finished up by getting some cookies in the coffee shop and chatting just us three. It was pretty great.

We had a pretty low-key, uneventful week with lots of movies, books and lying around cuddling. Except for Bub being in pain and taking meds around the clock, it was a pretty good week. He was so sweet and lovey and just wanted me to rock him for hours on end. Since I don't get to do that much, I was happy to oblige. Goober was even home most of the week fighting a nasty cough and cold. He gets over that stuff pretty easily though, he's not nearly as sickly as his brother, so he just needed rest and some TLC from mama. Sometimes life just calls for laziness.

The good news is that Bub is doing markedly better now! He's only taken two doses of pain meds the past two days, which is a vast improvement over 5-7 doses per day. He is sleeping really well and isn't complaining of his throat hurting at all. Praise God, he's finally healing! I look forward to a 2012 with no strep throat or ear infections. And no antibiotics would be nice as well.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Week in Review: January 29

For the past week, per Bub's request, we learned about dinosaurs. Our Five in a Row (FIAR) was Caldecott winner Time Flies by Eric Rohmann, which was a unique book to choose because it actually has no words. I thought it might be challenging because of this, but instead it made for some very lively and super fun conversations. His story dictation (which we do weekly) was really fun as he talked about the bird flying with and getting eaten by dinosaurs. He was really using his imagination with that book.

For the first three days, he did his Hooked on Phonics lessons and learned words with -ag and -ab sounds. He's coming right along with his reading! With the dinosaur theme, we read the How Do Dinosaurs...? books by Jane Yolen and some others that we found at the library. We also watched several documentaries on Netflix, our favorite being the BBC documentary series Before the Dinosaurs: Walking with Monsters (2005). Because this was Bub's surgery week, we ended up watching lots of movies and reading instead of doing formal lessons. We finished reading Beezus and Ramona and started reading Henry Huggins, both by Beverly Cleary and we watched the movie Ramona and Beezus.

He finished his Bible study at My Place With Jesus so we moved on to reading from his devotional Bible. We also listened to several episodes of Adventures in Odyssey, which both boys loved. We also had lots of fun making a salt dough volcano, painting using plastic dinosaurs, using dinosaur stamps, and drawing our favorite dinosaurs on butcher paper. We didn't make storytime this week, but he did get to go to OT and tell her all about our obstacle courses we've been making.

Bub says he loved learning about dinosaurs and now he knows how to tell between herbivores and carnivores and that he wishes we could make a volcano every day. He wants to do another dinosaur week sometime soon. He really did eat up this unit, just like he did with our bug unit last week.

Next week our theme is winter and snow and I have lots of fun winter-related books and activities. We'll also be learning about poetry, which should be very fun.

Friday, February 3, 2012

Searching for my Sanity

Have you seen my sanity? Photobucket Seriously, have you seen it?

Since finding out about Bub's surgery, I feel as though I've lost my mind. Well, to be honest, it was thinking of running away long before the surgery, but I had managed to hang onto it with bribery, begging, and promises I didn't intend to keep. But, with the stress of yesterday and the exhausting evening last night (long story short, Bub didn't sleep i.e. neither did I), it has fully left me. 

Gone like this was an abusive relationship (it was).

Gone like those cookies I made a couple days ago (Who ate those? Oh yeah, me).

Gone like yesterdays trash.

Okay, you get it. My sanity is so very gone that I forgot to pick Goober up from school today. Yes, I am mother of the year. Truth is, I had thought a friend was getting him but I had told her I would pick him up. Do I remember making that promise? Nope.

So, he was at school for 20 extra minutes because I have lost my mind. Poor kid. Now I have to make it up to him but surely he knows by now that I'm crazy and probably will forget to do that too, so instead he'll just have to accept my apologies. He's a good boy, he knows how stressed I've been. He never stays mad at anyone too long. I love him for that.

Anyway, if you're out wandering about and you see my sanity roaming the streets eating ice cream (or those cookies I didn't share), talking to itself, and muttering curses to my name under its breath , send it back my way. Chances are pretty good I'm going to need it sometime if I want to go back to being a good mom again. Or ever intend on homeschooling again. Something tells me I will need sanity to accomplish that well.

Tell it I'll give it anything it wants and I promise I'll be nicer from here on out if just comes back. 

Don't tell it that I probably won't keep those promises either, though.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Tubes In, Tonsils Out

Well, it's done. Today 5-year old Bub had tubes put in his ears and his tonsils removed. The surgery itself went well, my only complaint is that I was very specific in my instructions that he was not, under any circumstance, to be awake without me being with him. He has Asperger's and much anxiety comes with that, and I did not want him to be more anxious than he already was. I was very clear about that. I was able to stay with him while he was put under (which really frightened him and broke my heart) and then I left the operating room. Of course, I cried simply because 1) he was having surgery, 2) he looked so scared, and 3) seeing him go limp looked like he had died. It was unnerving. 

Then we waited. Finally they let us know he was okay and shortly thereafter, we got to see him. Even though I was clear with my instructions, he was awake and sitting up when we got back there. And he looked so sad. SO sad. I was ticked, needless to say. I ran to him and comforted him and let the nurse know I was upset. She tried to make light of the situation, but there was nothing about it that I found to be okay. If he had been a non-verbal autistic, they wouldn't have thought twice about making sure we were there when he woke up. But, because he looks "normal", has a great vocabulary, and seems logical and capable of being reasoned with, they made their own judgment. And that's not okay. He was so rattled and upset that he just cried and cried. His anxiety was so high he couldn't even make eye contact. Then, he out and out refused to speak. To us, but especially to them, which was actually really funny in a way. They'd ask him something, and he'd look away. He hated them for not getting me there faster, as did I. 

All the anxiety-inducing stuff aside, we've had some really funny moments in all this. First one was a few days before his surgery, he asked me, "When they take out my tonsils, will they put in new ones?". Then today, before the surgery, Bub decided he was a bunny, because bunnies don't have to get their tonsils out. Then was the moment he's been waiting for. We've been talking about this one for a week or so, and he finally got his chance in the car on the way home. Both boys were in the back seat and Bub looks at his brother and says, "Hey, where are your tonsils?" Goober answers, "In my mouth." To which Bub replies, "Oh yeah, well mine are in a trash can!" 

The funniest one came when we got home. I told Bub he could get up and play in spurts, but he needed to rest a lot. I said, "Just make sure you're listening to what your body is telling you. If you're tired, lay down. Make sure and drink lots and lots too." So, he sat on the floor to play, then told me that his body was telling him to rest. He laid down on the couch for a few minutes, then got up to get a coloring book. I said, "Whatcha doin?" to which he replied, "I'm listening to my body and right now it's bored." I almost peed my pants because I laughed so hard.
Currently he's cracking us up because he's on codeine (aw, baby's first narcotics ) and he's being so silly. He's barely talking because his throat hurts and he's thinking of the most random things to say. Nothing is funny enough to dictate here, but funny simply because he's not being his usual self.  

So, here's hoping this is worth it. He took 30 antibiotics last year for strep and ear infections (yes, you read that right...THIRTY), so this had better help. Otherwise, it isn't worth it.